I am not a random person, you just can't think as fast as me.

Don't worry lah, I'm done with the spiderman strangling business already.

So instead of the dude in his ridiculous red and blue costume,
with webbish patterns all around it,
and a stupid spider symbol in between his nipples,
I shall now proudly present...

Je Je Jang! Je Je Jang!

Someone-similiar-to-spiderman-but-only-with-boobs woman!

And the best part is,

she CAN do something which Spiderman CAN'T,
Yes my darlings,
she shoots

rafia strings.



Spiderman, ah spiderman,

you can friggin' kiss this hot momma's ass yo.

This world is so unfair.

This post is soooooooooooo depressing that I can eat a blue flower.

Why are there camwhores but no camgigolo-s?
Can't these poor gigolo-s make atleast a little name for themselves?
Hey gig-s, I feel for you.

Updates.....

will be done very very soon okay? :)
Give the woman some time people.

Somebody kill me.

I've made a mistake.
A huge one.
One that no sane person would ever make.



It's worse than giving the discipline teacher the finger.
It's worse than feeding a dog chocolates.
It's worse than barging into the wrong toilet.
It's worse than pooping and then realising that you didn't bring along the toilet paper.
And it's definitely worse than wearing your brother's underwear instead of yours.







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I friggin' addressed my MALE examinor as "Mrs".
Oh mama tuhan.
Bite me. Strangle me. Choke me. Lick me. Pee on me.
Or whatsoever.
Just make sure I die.
Goodbye cruel world, I sure will miss you.
xoxo :)

happy birthday HC and a BIG THANK YOU to everyone :)

HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY KOH HUEY CHEN!
You're finally 15 and I still cannot accept the fact that you're just a day older than me.
HMPH! *pouts*
Anyway, hope yours was a blast yo!
xoxo :)

Oh oh oh!
And now for my thankyou-s to the awesome people who really made my day :)
Thank you:

• Daddy
• Mummy
• Brother aka gorgor
• Bimbooooo for wishing me at 12.01 am and for the pressie!
• Huey Chen for being a day older than me :)
• Regin for the pressie!
  
• Zhuoxu for organizing the perfect BIRTHDAY SURPRISE!
• Karluis, Christine, Shu Li, and Aaron Leong for playing the birthday song using violins and cellos for me. You guys rock lah.
  
• 3A1 for the autographed paper. I'm gonna frame it up yo! :D
• Oh, and thank you 3A1 for the Vincci watch. Eh eh, VINCCI WEI!
  
• Zhee Xuan for spreading the word about my birthday to everyone who walked past us. Damn you.
• To those who wished me Happy Birthday. God Bless Y'all yo! :)

And a special thank you to those who had put in a great effort in preparing the surprise birthday party:

• Zhuoxu
• Bimboooooooooo
• Nellie
• Huey Chen
• Daniel
• Lionel
• Gwyneth
• Yu Sheng
• Park Chuan
• Zhi Kang aka Hong Gor
• Yi Hao aka Hou Gor
• Yi Zhung
• Pei Ru
  
• Bei Er
• Eunice
• Aaron Wong
• Chen Yang
• Hsieh Ming
• Haiyaaaah, I'm pretty much thanking everybody in 3A1 actually. LOL.

I LOVE YOU GUYS LAAAH! I'm so happy that I can strip and run around in the nake right now. Woooh! Pictures will be uploaded soon :)

Unable to forget the past.

It all happened on the 13th of May.

It was no doubt, love at first sight.
You were so attached to me that I actually felt that you were a part of my body.
Although you were much of a pain both physically and mentally,
I still took great care of you and made sure you wouldn't get hurt.


We certainly were made for one another,
We were destined to be together,
We were a perfect match,
Like a perfect set of bra and panty.
We were always together no matter day or night,
Rain or shine,
Spring or autumn,
Winter or summer,
Snow or blizzard,
Hurricane or tornado,
Moon or stars,
Pluto or Mars?


Remember those happy moments we used to have together?
We :
Ate together.
Played together.
Ran together.
Watched movies together.
Got drunk together.
Peed and pooed together.
We even took bathes together.


After all these bitter-sweet moments,
Everything we had been through,
YOU JUST HAD TO LEAVE ME.
And the way you left sucked. No, it still sucks.
No note.
No letter.
Not even a simple message.
You just mysteriously disappeared,
like you never existed.
You broke my teeth heart.
You really did.

But no matter wherever you are right now,
You must know,

that I still love you very very much, blister-boo :)
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.
.
.
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.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
NOT.
And damn you to the deepest pit of hell for giving me one helluva time whenever I had to take a bath.
eff you see kay.

study.study.study.

Nerd mode activated.

I, Audrey Chua, will be laying my hands off the keyboard for a month until the exams are officially over.
Which also means :
- No modem.
- No internet.
- No facebook.
- No blogging.
- No youtube.
- No porn movies.

Do not fret, my people, for I'll be back soon. Very very soon :)
Good luck in your exams yo! ;)